A shoulder to cry on...

"I know that this is over...
Now that we are through!
Nothing seems to make sense..
No matter what I do.
But, I try to pick these pieces..
And mend my broken heart.
All that comes to mind is..
Why did all this start?

I don't know...
I know not what to do?
Love ain't easy...
Oh can someone...
Stop this bleeding..
In this heart of mine? "
This is a melodious composition by a telegu music director, Ramana Gokula.

These two stanzas so beautifully captures my lonliness...

Why does it hurt when you lose someone/something you love?
Even though the loss could be partly credited to your insensitivity..and partly to your foolishness... You still feel the pain.
You can feel the pain slowing buildng up like a volcano; ready to erupt any moment.
Slowly and gradually your fingers feel numb....
Then all of a sudden you feel the touch of cold metal on your skin..
You cannot resist...you cannot move...
The blunt edge of the cold metal rests on your chest now...
You stop breathing, as if waiting for the metal to plunge through you and relieve you of your misery..
of your suffering...your loneliness...
The eerie silence hammers againsts your brain like clashing cymbals... the silence keeps building and so does your agony...
All of a sudden, the metals pierces its way through your skin... not enough to kill you...
but enough to make you bleed and aggravate your pain.

I close my eyes and try to think of the most pleasing moments in my life... fun times with family...
time with friends... Drop by drop, the wound is taking aways my strength. My mind goes blank!!
It feels as if the source that charges me is cut off.
I can hear the blood drops falling agains the tiled floor... as if dancing an rejoicing in my misery..

It is at moments like these that you miss your family and friends...
All we need at these moments, is a shoulder to cry on!!!

Suddenly, I am reminded of how beautiful it was to hear the raindrops beat across the windows..
Through the blurred window, I see my family.... happy!!! My friends... celebrating .
Colours return back to my eyes... The surroundings are not grim and dark anymore...

There is happiness everywhere... My pain is gone... the wound vanished!!!
I feel a hand on my shoulders.. and a gentle voice says : "Don't worry. Everything is OK.
There's a lot to celebrate in your Life. I will be there for you whenever you need me"

I look around and I see no one... but I shout with joy... "That's my guardian Angel!"
I am ALIVE & I need to CELEBRATE!!!