Wednesday, August 30, 2006

God and I

And I am a staunch believer of the latter..

God has been a constant factor throughout my life. He has been my friend and guide during good times and bad. Whenever I needed his love, he was there for me.
I believe that our God is a loving God.... A God who listens to the righteous and the sinners alike.
He does not ask me to change before I come to his refuge. He loves me and it is his love that changes me... reforms me.

The Holy Bible says:

"For God so loved the world that He gave His one and only Son, that whoever believes in Him shall not perish but have eternal life"(John 3:16).

"I came not to call the righteous, but sinners to repentance." (Luke 5:32).

Romans 6:23 says "For the wages of sin is death; but the gift of God is eternal life through Jesus Christ our Lord."

Lord, I take time, today, to repent for all my sins. I believe that whoever comes to you and believes in you will be bestowed by your wonderful love and grace.
O Lord, I pray to you for all my friends and family. Keep a close watch over all of us. We are the sheep and you are our shepherd.
We trust you with our life.

Today and Evermore...

Tuesday, August 22, 2006

Litter-ati


Please note that all the actors in the picture attached alongside are in their right senses.

Read: None of them are high on weed!!!)
This picture is just a dramatic representation of an act of illegal littering at Regent's Park in London.

During the filming of this there was no actual litter involved.

This amazing picture has been marred by your's truly because he could not control a sudden surge of laughter.
Other wise this picture would have come off even better.
As you must have aready noted, the person on my left, Mr X, is giving an intense performance. Now, that's what I call method acting. From the looks of it, either he is preparing to shoot or he is completed his hit and is putting the gun back in the holster.
Bachche ne poori jaan lagaa di hai is photo mein!! :-)
Here all of us try to play vile indian loafers/taporis for whom there is no sulabh shauchala/ public toilets. Whatever they find nearby is their shauchala.


On the other end of the photograph is Mr Y, trying hard to match the skills of Mr X. Again from the looks of it, it seems that this fellow is oblivious of his surroundings and is busy shooting...Bang bang bang.... ;-) ( You know what I mean ! )
So much talent around me that I had to burst out laughing.....
To tell the truth, this photo session was fun. I mean real FUN!

Now coming to the more serious truth, it is this visual imagery that has held back India's progress for a very long time. The entire World once thought that India was a land where people pissed and littered on the roads. It was supposed to be the land where people had no respect for others.
A land where they emptied their dustbins in the neighbour's yard, or maybe a construction site.

Facts say that India has progressed leaps and bounds. Facts say that the attitude of the world towards India has changed...Has it, Really?

Moreover, the real question is that has our mantality changed? Do we still throw litter on the roads? Think hard!!
May be a chewing gum....maybe a coke can....may be a chocolate wrapper..anything.
We are so many of us that even if each one threw 2 empty coke cans in Mumbai, it would be enough to fill up the entire Mahanagar in 40 days.
Phwew! Do you believe that?

I know that you will all ask me how I have come up to this number?
So, here's the answer:

The population of India is 1,095,351,995 people, excluding Azad Kashmir and Aksai Chin, disputed territories.
Wow!!!

Area of Mumbai = 437.71 km²

Now assuming that

1> all the coke cans are placed upright.
2> the radius is 4 cm.
3> cans are accumulated ( and not removed by the cleaning corps )

Area covered by one can =


22 * 4 * 4 SQ KM
---------------------
7 * 100000 * 100000


Area covered in 1 day if each indian throws 2 cans =
Area covered by one can * 2 * 1095351995
= 11.06 SQ KM

No of days required to cover Mumbai =


Area of Mumbai
------------------
Area covered in 1 day


= 40 days approx.


Shocking ain't it?

And with India's polulation increaing sharply (Read more about India's population threat @ BBCNews), keeping india clean is a very BIG challenge.

When I first came to London, I looked around for places that have Indian restaurants. People recommended EastHam and Southall.
So I took couple of friends, who had just landed to London, to EastHam . The place is literally jam-packed with Indians, Sri Lankans, Bangladeshis, and Pakistanis.
You can see restaurants that have their name boards in Tamil and Hindi. But my friends did not notice all this. They just saw the litter that was spread everywhere.
One of them remarked that "It looks like Chennai, with AC turned on. And it's really - really dirty! Very similar to India. Litter everywhere!"
While the other, (as if in a trance... First day onsite and looks like he is back to India!!!) commented with a frown of disgust on his face... "Typical Desis!"

What do we do to change this opinion about ourselves? If we have this opinion about ourselves, I shudder to think what others think about us.
It's a huge effort and all of us have to take part in it!

P.S> I have to start from my room. There is so much litter around. Polythene bags, food stuff, aluminium foils, tissues..and what not!!! I will start NOW!




Sunday, August 20, 2006

Yun hota to kya hota?


Note :
Dear readers.
I am not a pundit in Hindi. And I apologize my readers if this poetry comes across as cheesy and corny.
It's just a thought that came across my mind and I just put it on paper.


Yun hota to kya hota... Kya hota 'gar yun hota to..
Aisa hota...waisa hota...Kya mere paas paisa hota?
Bangla hota...Gaadi hoti?
Yun hota to kya hota?

Zindagi se maine yeh sawaal kai baar kiye
ki, yun hota to kya hota?
Zindagi muskurayi, aur yeh jawaab diya...
Main hi na hoti to kya hota?


Isn't it true that we often ask ourselves "What if this had happened?".
"Wouldn't our life have been better?"

Will thinking about this be of any help? It would just aggravate the pain. Nothing else.
The only useful thing that you can do at this time is to look back and reflect how better you could have handled the situation.

We need to learn from our mistakes..or better from others..
Don't overplan or underplan life. Take it as it comes.

And remember... "Jo hota hai...woh, achche ke liye hota hai!"

Your travel mate.




Saturday, August 19, 2006

Kabhi Alvida Na Kehna... The Review

Note: The title of my post has been inspired by the tonnes of Bollywood movie titles, which reads like for e.g.

Daag - The Fire (Yaar is aag mein mujhe bhi jala de!!!)
Mudda - The Issue (Spare me please! Get me a tissue)
Kyon ki - It's fate (What the FCUK? mate!!!)

And loads like these.

Now lets get back to the review. I have Mr. Black and Mr.White with us to give us company today.

Me : Dudes, the movie really sucked bigtime. Ain't it?

Mr Black: $ucked??? I thought "Kal Ho Na Ho" sucked. This one is nowhere in the same league!

Mr White: Arey nahi yaar...It was a cool movie. Not as good as Karan's other masterpieces, but still quite viewable.

Me : Whoa! Whoa! Whoa! Hold on. Do you know I wasted 8£ on this movie. There was not even a part of the movie which I thought did justice my expenses.
Oh wait. There was a 15 second guest appearance by Kajol (my fav actress!!! I wish my wife be a Kajol Part2)

Mr. Black: Don't bank on Part2's. They are never hits!

Mr. White: I got you on this one Dude. What say about
Shrek2 & Spiderman2?

Mr. Black: $crew you. They are animations!

Mr. White: I beg to differ. Spiderman is not an animation!

Me : Hey! Stop your banter. We are here to discuss KANK.

Mr. White: Okay. Sorry mate.

Mr. Black: Whatever!!!

Me : One good thing about the movie that it played Dhoom2 trailer( Not DOOM2 puhleeeeeeez!!! )

Mr Black (wicked smile) : Another part2 movie? Shouldn't we be talking about KANK.

Mr White : They showed Dhoom2 trailor while KANK screening so it can be cosidered a part of the movie experience.

Me : India sure is progressing. Extra marital affairs are now being openly portrayed on tv and films. Even in KANK extra marital affair is shown... but was it justifed?
Mr Black : This is the saddest take on the subject, ever!! If you want to watch sensible movies on the subject then you should watch
Arth or Silsila.

Mr White : No. Not at all! The movie has helped cine goers realize that such affairs are not bad.
It might help people some people who are still unable to make a choice between spouse and lover. Why ruin your spouse's life, if you dont love him/her.
Its an honest attempt at filmmaking.

Me : Spare me the rant! Whats so honest about the movie? Karan has just made the movie to earn some NRI bucks.
This movie has been packaged only for NRI audiences. the lavish costumes... extravagant sets... party numbers...strong cast with NRI fav Shah(halkata hua)Rukh Khan leading the pack.

Mr Black (turning to Mr White): There is no logic employed in the movie. Tell me
1> Why is Shahrukh always irritable throughout the movie?
2> Why is Rani so obsessed with cleanliness?
3> What has Abhishek done( or NOT done ;-}) to be classified as a Kid?
4> Why does Rani hate Abhishekh? Is he as bad as me in creating a mess in a room?
5> Why does respectable Amitabh ji( playing the not so respectable Sexy Sam), have a new gal daily and yet have the audacity to give a speech saying that he loves his late wife?

Me : I know the answer to the 5th question. A friend told me that Sexy Sam sleeps with women so that he may forget his wife's demise.

Mr Black: What friend? Mr. White kya? What the FCUK? Hasn't Sam heard of the good ol' way of drinking to death?
Now I know why Sam's sexy... He can screw himself to death!!! ha ha ha..

Mr White (a disapproving frown on his face): But the music is great, you know!
Me : Ya, I think I can somewhat to agree to that. The "Mitwaa" song was sure melodious and fresh.

Mr Black : But the songs are never in sync with the situation. And the first song.. (Glad that i don't remember it!!)It was so horrible that I could not resist from going out to grab a popcorn.

Mr White: All actors played their parts brilliantly.

Mr Black (in a subdued tone..): to make the movie worse.

Me : Yes. Shahrukh was in good form and scored a century. Abhishekh scored a quickfire 50. Rani was also in brilliant nick. Apart from a few moments of anxiety, while approaching the well compiled century. It was a very good innings, very closed to what she pulled off in Sanjay Leela Bhansali's Black. Preeti had nothing much to do than to be her bubbly self and play some exquisite cover drives. And our experienced middle order batsman, played really well but was out to a horribly conceived carricature( read: Sexy Sam!).
Kirron, as magnificient as ever, played a sweet little innings.

Wonderful as they batted, they were let down when they came on to bowl. Karan lacked pace in his bowling. And as a captian, Karan did not set his field right. Lot many missed chances. Unlike his previous encounters, this time around, his captaincy was flawed and this cost the team the match.

Mr.White : Ok. I agree that he did not get it perfect this time, but I am sure that his next will be good.

Mr. Black : That's just a Purr-fect ending. My advice to your readers would be "Kabhi...Karan Johar ki picture na dekhna....."

Me : I sure will remember it.

P.S> Some researchers belive that Karan was inspired by the hollywood film
Closer (If you haven't watched it, please do so. It's definitely worth a dekho).
But, the main difference between Closed and KANK is that :

In Closer, Extramarital Affairs is wrong and it RIGHTFULLY punished but in KANK,
it is considered acceptable and is RIGHTFULLY forgiven.
Now I am confused.. Which one is more Right ;-)

Cheers. Have a great day.

Tuesday, August 15, 2006

Happy Independance Day!!!


We Indians celebrate our 60th year of Independence today (15th August '06).
And we at 61, Abbots Wharf had our own small flag hoisting ceremony! ;-)
Today I choose to look back.....
Look back and remember the sacrifices made by millions of people to bring us where we are today.
We have fought long and hard for our Independence.
All these sacrifices have not gone waste...and India, our motherland is now free.

But, now what?
What do we do, now that we are independent?
We always crib that India is this....India is that....
What do we do to make India a better place?
I very well accept the fact that I am happy that I am not anyone's slave. But I am still a slave to my passions... We are still very much in balls and chains....bound tightly to our religious beliefs...castism and racism...
Then, what are we happy about?

If we read the newspapers, all the headlines today indicate that India is on an high alert. The PM, in his address to the nation, asks Pakistan to stop cross-border terrorism. Pakistan responds immidiately asking India for proof for the same.
The PM's address can be read here.

I remember Tagore's beautiful poem, which I learned in the 7th Grade.

"WHERE the mind is without fear and the head is held high
Where knowledge is free
Where the world has not been broken up into fragments
By narrow domestic walls
Where words come out from the depth of truth
Where tireless striving stretches its arms towards perfection
Where the clear stream of reason has not lost its way
Into the dreary desert sand of dead habit
Where the mind is led forward by thee
Into ever-widening thought and action
Into that heaven of freedom, my Father, let my country awake."


That is perfect freedom. And in order to attain it, each of us need to play our part.
This Independence Day, India beckons you to do your part!

I wish you all a wonderful Independence...today and evermore.

Cheers.


Monday, August 14, 2006

Sum, Sub and lots of "Love"thmatic


When two people meet, do they instantly fall in Love?
Or, do they slowly grow into each other?
Bachelors may have a different perspective on this topic, so let me check with a married friend of mine.
You would definitely remember
him...
The guy who mentioned once that : "If it doesnt work your way, try it your wife's way".
So let's ask him, what he thinks of love? Also lets check what his counterpart has to say.

Me : This is going to be an interview full of personal questions. Please feel free to "No comments" any of them if you feel awkward answering. ;-)

Me : Sub, What does Love mean to you?

Sum : Well I've come across this question many a times in my Life and always believe that "It's not the DEFINITION of love ,but the PRESENCE of Love which matters.
Love is a complicated machinery for some ,but at times all you need is a good screw to fix it .

Me : Well! Let's hope that I find my screw soon. ;¬) Sub, What are your thoughts on this?

Sub : Love cannot be described in words , it can only be felt. I believe love makes a person better coz when you love somebody you learn how to care and share.


Me (Scratching my head) : I know how to care and share? Does that mean I am in Love?
Still confused! ;¬(
How long did you take for you to realize that you were in Love with Sub?

Sum : Almost 3 months
Me : What about you , Sub?
Sub : Hmmm.. 2-3 months.
Me : I am glad both of you realized at the same time. It took me over an year to convince someone to be friends with me!!

Me : Did you propose to Sub, or did she propose to you? How did it happen?
Sum : There was nothing like ' Do you love me ?' or 'Will you marry me?' . The foundation was Friendship; "aur dosti kab rishteydaari mein badal gayi pata hi nahin chala".
Me : That's a cliche!

Me : Do you really think that the common notion "Opposites attract" is true? Are you and Sub opposites?
Sum : "Opposites attract' is undoubtedly true but that wasnt exactly the reason to bring us close. Our hobbies,interests , passions , likings , disliking were and are still almost same.

Me : Any comments, Sub?
Sub : Its not quite true in our case. Because we are similar in most things. But on the things we differ, we are poles apart.

Me : I understand that there was a time during your courtship that both of you were countries apart.Is it true that "Distance increases fondness and liking" ?

Sum : Wont completely agree with this because there is another saying called 'Out of Sight Out of Mind'. We were countries apart after around 2 years of our courtship and were already engaged , moreover we knew that its gonna last just for few months.
It really was one of the difficult days of our lives and decided that we WONT let that happen again . To hell with the fact that "Distance increases fondness and liking"
Sub : Somehow these sayings do not hold for both of us . Fondness and Liking was already there; Distance or no distance . We couldn't give time to each other , we were not there for each other when we needed . So all in all we are happy together and try to forget that phase as a bad dream.

Me : Is it true that you have to be the best of friends before you can be the best of lovers?
Sum : True in our case but i personally wont completely agree to this.
Sub : Oh Yes , 100 %.

Me : Does Love really mean to accept a person as is? Or, to try to change someone if you think that's better? Is there something that you would like to change about Sub?
Sum : At first Love really means to accept a person as is , but as they say 'Nobody is perfect' and hence love can make one a better person.
One thing I wud like to change is her 'Fear Factor'. No Roller Coaster rides , no ghost movies . She doesnt like taking risks and is content with her play safe mentality. I want her to become more strong both physically and emotionally.

Me :And how about you Sub? Is there anything that you want to change about Sum?
Sub :Hmmm..his 'who gives a damn' attitude.

Me : What would you present Sub, if you won a 10,000£ lottery?
Sum : Pheeww!!! 10,000 Pounds which means around around 8.7 lakh...Hmmm ..Cheverolet Optra wud be fine.
There are other things too but that i can buy now also without those 10000 Pounds! :-).
Me : Desi to desi hi rahega ;-) Pound se INR conversion koi aur nahi karta! What would you have done, Sub?

Sub: BOSE music system.

Me : Thanks for your time. It has been a pleasure knowing you guys. You have always seemed a happy couple. Stay the same.
Hope my readers now have a better insight to Love.

Note : To get more info about Sum and Sub, please visit their website (This is going to expire on 18th Aug, so please make it fast!!):
"A Tale of Love"
And I am trying to convince them to move all the contents on blogspot. If successful in his attempt, Your's Truly will update the link!

P.S> Comments from the couple about Your's Truly.
Thank u to u too for considering us on your Noble Blog.


P.P.S> Noble Blog!! ha ha ha

Sunday, August 13, 2006

Rain!Rain! Go Away! Li'l Rosh wants to play..


I hate the British Weather!!!! ;¬(
A very strong statement to make..... But its true!
The only good season in Britain is the "Summer", but sadly it lasts only a couple of months... and now it is soon fading.
Your's Truly and his gang went out to play cricket today.
They also carried football with them in case the weather played tricks and it started drizzling as the Weather Experts had forewarned.
But to their dismay, only after a over and a half were bowled, and one wicket down,
the rains came pouring down... So hard that it was impossible even to play football!!

They waited under the protection of the trees for 5 minutes before rushing back to the comfort of their homes.

And so a day wasted!! All because of the stupid rains...

"I really don't understand the rains. It doesn't rain where it is required and it magnanimously pours its hearts contents where people don't require it... It kills people by not raining...it kills people by excess raining...."


Why does it not rain when people desperately long for it? The rain shies away...killing the crops and the vegetation around.... and also crushing the hopes of the poor farmers..

I was listening to the news, and was really upset to know that the rain was playing havoc in Maharashtra and Andhra Pradesh.
People are ,even as I write, losing their lives to excess rain and flash flood.

I hope that soon someone invents something to prevent such mishaps. A far-fetched idea, but hope its comes true.

I am looking out of window, and I can see the sun playing "hide and seek" behind the clouds. Its gives me a glimmer of hope that soon it will stop raining.
Hope is that keeps us all alive..... You, Me, Our families, Our friends , Our neighbours... and ALL others we don't know yet.

Keep Living....Keep Hoping!
God Bless All!

Saturday, August 12, 2006

Kyonki .. Adults bhi kabhi Kids thay


Due to Your's Truly's limited photography skills, he is using an image from the movie "Superbabies: Baby Geniuses 2" and the image is Copyright © 2002 Sony Pictures Entertainment.

-----------------------

Talking about kids, have you ever noticed how kids sometimes, knowingly/unknowingly, react to the situation around them? If you hurt them, their immidiate reaction would be to get back at you...
If all around them are happy, they would definitely express their own happiness with the broadest and cutest smiles that you would ever see.
As adults we have been taught to think twice before we speak. But, kids don't act or behave that way. Kids do not think what the results of their actions might be.
They are free.. A freedom, we somtimes wish that we had! (At least I do sometimes!!)
Not caring what the world has to say.... and enjoy life with gay abandon!!!

I wish that once in a while, I could let out the kid in me.

Thought I should narrate some "Funny" some "Not So Funny" encounters with kids that come to my mind now.
I will keep updating the post as and when I remember any other incidents.

Incident 1:
------------
Some years back, there was a small mishap that happened in JamPot.
Note : People from Jamshedpur, loving call their city JamPot
A schoolbus carrying kids from LKG to 2nd Grade had overturned somehow.
Thankfully no one was seriously injured.
There was one kid, who I think was luckiest among the lot. She did not even have a minor bruise.
My aunt(again), a staff nurse was co-ordinating with the other staffs to give some tetanus shots to the injured kids.
This gal, was seeing all her friends getting some shots or medicines.
Do you know what she did next?
She started crying aloud. When the doctors turned her attension to her, she told them that her stomach was aching and that she would require a shot to cure her.
The Doctors knew that she was bluffing and again continued to igrore her, but to their dismay, the weeping only increased.
Finally they has no choice but to give her a shot of "saline" .
One shot and she was perfectly ok!

Incident 2:
------------
I remember another incident when I declined to go out to play with my niece.
Note : She was 5.5 yrs old at that time.

I was expecting an important phone call.
The call was to notify if I were lucky to be assigned a project at very famous company.
After waiting for a hour or so, I got bored and started watching television.

Into 5 minutes of watching tv, I heard my niece talk to some one that I was not currently available.And that he should call me later. That's when I realized what she had just done.

She had vent out her anger at me by making me wait further for the results.
Never again was I to anger her!!!

Incident 3:
------------
We were watching
"Allan Quatermain and the Lost City of Gold" at her house. My Aunt (again!!!) had invited some of her friends to her house, that same evening.
Before they were to come, my aunt adviced my niece to take bath and get dressed.
But, you know how kids loathe taking bath!!!
Even I hate it sometimes ;¬) More so in freezing winter!

My nice decided to give her mom a tough time. Finally forcibly she was made to take bath!
Moms always WIN!!

The guests arrived and I was glad that even my niece was on her best of behaviours.
It was at that particular moment that "Richard Chamberlain" decided to kiss "Sharon Stone".... Why did it have to happen
this very instant?

My niece giggled aloud!
All attension was now focussed on her.
"That's what Dad does to Mom during the night!!"

I spoke to myself: "What the F***!!! That's a low blow!!! Definite a low blow!!! But it may be an unintentional one!! "
My aunt, being a typical desi wife, blushed... then recomposed herself and gave my niece a nice "twack!!!"


Incident 4:
------------
While on a trip to Scotland, I stayed at one of my friend's place.
It was there that we made friends with his nephew "Cal", an awesome dude.
To know his age you have to click the link on his name ;-)
I remember, how initailly he was too shy to come near us, but then later we became good friends.
And when we were leaving their house, the moment we got into the cab, he started crying?
How did he know we were leaving?
No one told him???
----------------------

Somewhere within us there is a kid still hidden... A kid who is instinctive ... rash ... stubborn ... free!!!
Maybe some people would say that they have left their childishness long back!!!
but, I totally disagree because of my personal experiences!
Kyonki .. Hum sabhi bhi kabhi bachche thay!!
Have a great day!

P.S>
Even though there is a kid inside all of us we need to remember to tame that kid! Please note : Do not cage it altogether...
But have him on a leash... We don't want the kid to take control! ;¬)


Friday, August 11, 2006

The Perfect Imbalance


An oxymoron, you would think!!! Just put in order to gain that extra hype and attention.
The same trick that the Cinema makers follow; be it the extra hype about the shower scene in the movie.. or, be it the unwanted Item Numbers with dancers showing more of cleavage rather than the actual dance itself.

But, the fact is that this term holds true to a lot of us.

I classify "Perfect Imbalance" (or, the PI factor) as a situation wherein you have a choice between the "good" or the "bad"... the "joys" or the "sorrows"... the "light" or the "darkness"... and you keep enjoying/wanting to enjoy the good/bright side and hence upsetting the equilibrium of life.
The end is definitely not pretty... Once you disturb the imbalance, you gradually lean sideways towards your chosen "good" side, till one day you fall.

Many people(this incluses me) fail to understand the precariousness of the PI situation.
Fot most of us, PI is all we crave for because we think that we will be happy if we stay in the perfect position. This is all a fallacy. No one can stay happy all his life; Or, stay sad all his life!

We tend to forget that life is all about balance... And by striving for the Perfect Imbalance, we ruin the whole meaning of Life itself.
Life is meant to be enjoyed one step at a time... whatever happens... It is Life!
As they (read: Wise Men) always say, "Change is the only constant thing in Life". And without change we are as good as dead.

My life has never been the straight kind... And I have to admit that I've, somewhere along the lines, longed for the "Perfect Imbalance"...

But i was to realize later, that it's not the right place to be. Life, really loses its meaning if ALL things go your way.
You may still breathe... But, for Life, you don't seem to exist anymore.
Slowly and gradually you lose out on those wonderful feelings that you may have encountered had you been alive.


With time, I have evolved! And I have just one advice to give:

Stay ALIVE!!! Stay BALANCED!!!

And remember, To enjoy Life; you don't need the PI factor in your life!!!

P.S> Anything in excess is bad... I will quote Shakespeare here..
"Play on you musisians. Give me excess of it..that surfeiting the apetite may
die and hence sicken."


Thursday, August 10, 2006

Of Uncles and Aunties......and a Sanskaari Me ;)


Have we ever pondered that, by now, each one of us would have addressed 1000s of people as uncles and aunties?

Before we continute with this post, do you know that Jackie Shroff is acting in a new movie for children called Bhoot Uncle?
Not very long ago, he did another film called King Uncle which was a disaster.
I sincerely hope that this one is better.

Note : "I absolutely love childrens movies ;P"

Coming back to our main question for today,

What do you call your "Chacha" & 'Chachi'? Uncle & Aunty!
What do you call your "Mama" & 'Mami'? Uncle & Aunty
What do you call your "Mr.& Mrs. Next Door Neighbour"? Uncle & Aunty
What do you call your "Mr.& Mrs. Shopkeeper @ The Local grocery Store"? Uncle & Aunty
What do you call your "Dad's colleague"? Uncle or Aunty

My parents have always instilled in me a sense of respect towards others, so whenever i am unsure of the relationship, I manage to easily get out of the situation by addressing them as Uncle and Aunty.

My "Sanskaar" is so strong that once I managed to call a girl (3 years younger to me as Aunty)
Wow! I still remembered the flustered look on her face... and when she politely requested me to call her by her first name... that was the perfect Kodak Moment!
I smiled shyly... scratched my head for a while... let the information sink-in...
Trust me, it was so difficult to call her by her firstname (because of the amount of sanskaar put into me by my parents) that I stammered and stuttered before uttering "XXX" in a low voice.
It took so much of effort and cause me so much mental trauma (Don't know if I can exactly classify it as mental trauma..Ha ha ha...), that from then onwards, I never addressed her before speaking. ;¬)

But, this too wasn't without shortcomings....

I remember that once when I asked her something at the dinner table, I almost got three simultaneous responses.

Life is really tough for a Sanskaari Desi ;¬)

Tak taka tak! Tak taka tak!!


Yipeeeeeeee!!!! Sayesha commented on my post!!!!!
I am so happy that I am on the verge of being ecstatic.
I had first stumbled across
Sayesha's World, when I was going thru one of my friends blogs
where she had mentioned about
Namkeen doing a "Kaavya Viswanathan" (i.e Namkeen was blatantly copying Sayesha's posts and calling it her own).
How can people stoop so low as to narrate someone elses story as if it were their own?
A little bit of "Spice"( read: lie) here and there is certainly justifiable....
But if the entire curry is made only of spices, then certainly, the results wont be pleasant.

But, let bygones be bygones.

After my first visit to Sayeshaz, I could not resist going back for more....
As I said it's so tempting that "No one can read just one!!!" ;¬)
She has immense talent....

I would be the happiest person on earth if I were half as talented with the pen as she were.
Her writings are pure and chaste... not in the conventional sense though...
(She proclaims to be a Bhai ;¬)
But, when you read her posts, you know that they are for real.
She puts the smallest of incidents on her blog with so much ease and elan that even the mighty

Sachin with his most elegant of cover drives may be left behind.
(Sachin fans..Please dont kill me!!! I was just flattering Sayesha." ;¬)

I am glad that I got a chance to visit Sayeshaz.....
It's now my favourite spot in the entire Blogsphere.

Note : Your's truly has not yest explored the entire Blogsphere...
He may find more prettier places,but as they say :
"First love is first love. Nothing can compare to it!"

I watched an old episode of the
"Great Indian Laughter Challenge" today, and I came to know
that when you are filled with joy...your heart goes.."Tak taka tak!! Tak taka tak!!!"

Background Music : "Tak taka tak!! Tak taka tak!!!" ....
Music catching pace now : "Tak taka tak!! Tak taka tak!!!"
Reached its peak at 200 bpm : "Tak taka tak!! Tak taka tak!!!"
Now getting lower : "Tak taka tak!! Tak taka tak!!!"

Next day morning : The silent hum of "Tak taka tak!! Tak taka tak!!!" still can be heard!

Cheers and God Bless All.

Wednesday, August 09, 2006

The Black Trouser Killing!!!


My running nose destroyed my favourite black trousers!
Sounds weird, I know.
But, it's true.

I had a bloody cold and a running nose...
So i took a paper towel and put in my trouser's poke'...
But, the need never arose..
So the towel stayed me in my poke'!

But, when I put my trouser for wash...
I forgot to search it for coins and cash..
So, in my trouser's pocket, the towel stayed..
and stayed there till it had it (my fav black trouser) destroyed...

Ultimate crappy poetry that has ever been composed....
(Not even worth being called a poetry! But, still ;¬) I will continue calling it one.)

Analysis : Never allow paper tissues/towels to mix with your black clothes.
It's a certain demise for all your beloved black clothing ;¬)

P.S> My bloody cold had been found guilty as charged. It has been sentenced to death by shots of Lemsip!

Tuesday, August 08, 2006

The Joys and Sorrows of a Desi living in a Shared Accomodation in London


When I first came to London, I was really unsure about my life here.... I was not sure if I would be able to withstand the winter.... and more than that my lonliness...

I was not certain about anything in my life at that moment.... Would I be able to make new friends here? Will there be anything bright and beautiful in the almost gloomy life of mine?
Well, by the grace of God, Life has been just perfect...
Have met some great people.... made a lot of friends... have managed to land up with amazing roommates...
No one can ask for more.....
We have rented out a beautiful apartment in one of the residential complexes. It's really a beautiful accomodation. But sharing a flat with other people comes with its own set of boons and banes.. Let me list down a few of them.

Pros :
1. You just have to cut the onions and tomatoes and wait at the dining table. Rest everything is completed by your benevolent flatmates!

2. When you go out for groceries, you have many hands to carry the stuff to home.
3. When you feel lonely, you can just barge into other's room and talk to your heart's content. (Whether they actually listen is another matter altogether!)
4. Need to play Cricket or Football, all you need to do is to whistle ... and lo!!! you have a team of 4-5 ready!
5. When you buy a new TV or a satellite receiver, you have 3-4 other people to share the expenses.

Cons :
1. When you have a personal call to make... (A REALLY personal call), the only place that you are left undisturbed is the restroom ;¬(
2. You want to watch Friends, but your roomies veto it out and watch "Big Brother" instead!!
3. More people More mess!!! More shoppers so more unnecessary stuff at home !!
4. When you URGENTLY have to go( you know where ), there will already be someone else inside.

5. When someone buys and new gadget, that you very rarely use or (Do not absolutely need), you still have to share the expenses.

Have a great day!!


Monday, August 07, 2006

Fart-i-Fact


Watching Jackass:The Movie, I know, is very weird way to spend your Saturday Nights..
And having nothing else to do, Your's Truly and his Gang 'o Four, decided to spend the precious 2 hrs of their evening watching Johnny Knoxville and his band(read: Jackasses) perform idiotic stunts and getting themselves hurt in the process..
Well, one things for sure. Either you will be totally grossed out, or you will enjoy it till your bones rattle.
I have to tell you folks about one particular stunt, which triggered a array of thoughts in my mind. Have you ever thought of firing a rocket cracker from you A$$?
Well, The Jackasses have! It was one of the weirdest stunts that I have seen.
And it only question that came to my mind was "Can you burn fart?"
What if the actor had really farted during this act?

Can fart be ignited? Would there have been an explosion had he farted at that moment?
Mathematically speaking, the probability of farting at that specific moment would be very low.

These quesions made me devote some time on Sunday to surf the net and explore more about fart.
I now understand that some of parameters that lead to fart may be
a> The amount of beans+eggs+meat+cauliflower eaten the upto 24 hours.
b> Number of fizzy drinks had within 6 hours of the feat.

c> Number of chewing gums chewed within past 8 hours.
and many more on the same lines..
And as for the question whether you can ignite farts :
Research says that fart can be ignited because they contain methane and hydrogen, both of which are inflamable. If the fart constitutes of more percentage of methane, it will burn with blue flame.(Note : Methane burns with a blue flame. 10th Grade Chemistry)
Also if it contains higher than normal content of Oxygen, there is a very good change of an explosion, if you were to try to burn it.
I visited the local bookstore yesterday along with "Sarkari" who had planned to buy a good book.
While he was doing his rounds, in the cricketing books section, I wandered across to the weird and miscellaneous collection.
After browsing through a few rather weird books, I came across a title that really took me by surprise.
"Why Do Men Have Nipples?" by Mark Leyner and Billy Goldberg
And the tagline read :"Hundreds of questions you'd only ask your doctor after your third martini!"....
Well that's true. You wouldn't dare asking these questions to a doctor if you are sober ;¬)
So, I thought definitely someone would have the same query in mind as me. "Can you really really REALLY ignite fart".
Well this book answers this and a lot more such weird questions!
Definitely a good read!!!!

Happy reading......
Cheers!


Sunday, August 06, 2006

Six Whacko Men....


Been a pretty long time since my last post... Was running on a tight schedule...

Will try to spare some solid time this week.

This picture, that you see alongside, was taken when few friends got together for a fun weekend!!!
FUN translates to (sports + booze + movies + awesome food)
I will now introduce you to the gang..(names are read out from the left...Your left).

Whacko 1 :Vishu,

-----------------
aka The Chicken Killer : named so because of his insatiable hunger for chicken!!
aka The Rebel : named so because of the fight that he put forward to get here(read: Onsite)
Note: Onsite is the most cherished place that a SE loves to be in.

Whacko 2 :Gagan,
------------------
aka The Artist : named so because of his undeniable talent with arts....and also his intermittent bursts of wierd reneditions of famous songs.
aka GBP : named so because of the uncanny similarity between his initials and Great British Pound

Whacko 3 :Sunil,
------------------

aka The WhizKid : named so because of he is the only one among us who in the Cambridge University
(more specifically, On a scholarship)
aka KappaJi : It's all in the name....Kappa is the first syllable of his surname, Ji is added out of honour.

Whacko 4 :Yours Truly,
-----------------------

aka The Genius : named so because of his ability to come up with geniunely weird ideas
aka Mamu : Dont know why???

Whacko 5 :Kanth,
------------------

aka The SportBoy : He once told me that he likes Sports, in all its various sizes and formats....A very enthusiastic Sport watcher.
aka Megastar Kanth : named so because of his passion for telegu movies!!

Whacko 6 :Atul,
----------------

aka The Saviour : named so by his colleagues for saving their A$$es during his many projects
aka Sarkari : again named by his colleagues for his routine departure from office at 6:00 in the evening sharp, very commonly associated with the Sarkari babus (Public Office Bearers).

Signing off....